72 hours and a broken smile

72 Hours I'll never forget...

(Long story...bear with me...I'm journaling...not that I'll forget)
The past week and a half haven't been what I would call fun. In fact, I don't really have the words to describe how life has been. Sunday afternoon about four thirty, I started having pain in my lower back on the left side. This of course meant that a kidney stone was preparing to pass. I took some pain killers I had a home to try and get on top of the pain, which worked for a little while. I prepared myself for a really bad night, but was determined to try and pass this one at home instead of having to go to the hospital (we spend way to much time there). I spent the next thirteen hours curled up on the couch with my pillow and running to the bathroom throwing up. After thirteen hours of sheer pain, I couldn't take it anymore. I called my awesome friend Mindy L. and she came and stayed with my kids at 5:30 in the morning and then took them to her house for the day. I can't thank you enough for being such a great friend and taking care of my children. I knew they were in good hands and I honestly didn't have to worry.

Blake took Madie and I to the Fruita ER (thinking it would be better if we were closer to home for the kids). Got there and after being in the ER till honestly I can't remember what time they sent me over to a place to get a CT scan done to see where the stone was. I of course in all grace and beauty threw up right in front of the doors before we even made it into the building. The receptionist, bless her heart, came out to see if she could help. We got inside, had the scan done and headed back for the ER. Fruita at this point was one week off of opening their brand new hospital, so I had to travel to get the scan done. So I got hooked back up to all the IV fluids and waited to hear from the doctor. They tried to keep me as comfortable as possible to with Morfin, but I tell ya, it just wasn't happening.

Dr. Hughes, wonderful man, came in and told us that the stone was stuck in my ureter tube and was closer to my kidney than it was to passing. They admitted me into the hospital and tried once again to keep me "comfortable". I spent the rest of the day and night throwing up and wishing someone would knock me out. Blake called a friend in our ward and he came that night and helped give me a blessing. Then next morning it was decided that they needed to transfer me over to St. Mary's hospital where the urologist could see me and hopefully make a decision about what to do with the stone that WOULD NOT MOVE. I called Blake and found out the kids, all THREE older kids had spent the night THROWING UP with the flu. I guess they felt left and decided to join in the fun. We knew we couldn't leave them with a friend, so it was decided that I would call and have a friend take me.

Thank heaven for angels disguised as friends. My wonderful Young Women's president Kristen, that I am councilor to came and took me to the hospital. She stayed with me the WHOLE day! Yes the WHOLE day. She was surely heaven sent. It was so wonderful to have her there to help pass the time. We got there and the nurses assistant pretty much told me it would be a while before they could get me anything to help with the pain and nausea...thank goodness the nurse was already prepared and walked in with both in hand. Bless her heart for being on her toes. By that afternoon it was decided that I was going to have to have Lithotripsy done to blast the kidney stone so I could pass it. I was scheduled for 3:30 because the man who runs the machine was leaving for vacation at 5 and wasn't going to be back for a few days.

They did the surgery. When I woke up, I felt like I couldn't breath. They had to put a tube down my throat since I was completely under for the procedure. The nurse kept telling me to cough and that I was a week cougher. Honestly, I wanted her to try coughing after throwing up for 48 hours, feeling like you've been stabbed in the back for 48 hours, and had a tube down you throat. Once I was awake enough they took me back to my room. Kristen stayed with me through the surgery and was waiting for me after. Thank you so much. She headed out that night to be with her girls at a fun Fashion show that I was supposed to go to. Mindy stopped by that night for a little bit to visit. I wasn't feeling very well, so she didn't get to stay too long, but I really appreciated her stopping by. I was so tired of being pumped full of drugs at this point, so I said a prayer and was able to fall asleep on my own. I woke up about midnight feeling pretty good and actually took a shower. I looked in the mirror and I won't even describe what I saw. Not pretty, I'll just say that. They kept me over night because I developed an infection and they needed to make sure I didn't spike a fever. I slept for the rest of the night and was able to go home mid morning.

Thank you also to Andrea who brought a meal over to my family while I was in the hospital and took my kids while Blake picked me up at the hospital and got me settled back in at home. The kids had a blast with the water slide! Two hours after I got home my wonderful angel Mom showed up!! I can't thank my wonderful husband and mom enough for everything they did. I pretty much did nothing but sleep, eat and sit for the next few days. They did EVERYTHING...the laundry, cleaning, cooking, shopping...you name it, they did it. Since I can't nurse anymore, Blake got Madie adapted to a bottle and food. I am the luckiest person to have such awesome friend and family for my support system. My Mom even stayed Saturday because I wasn't ready for her to leave, not that I'm ever ready. Sunday morning she headed home. And so we come to the next part...

A Broken Smile...
Sunday morning my tongue felt really funny...like I had burned it, but I hadn't. I didn't think much of it till my eye started to feel weird. Still I wasn't too concerned. It had been a long week and I had been under a little stress. I stayed home from church with Brandon (who had a cold) and by the time Blake got home from church my face started to feel funny. I called my Mom for the second time and she told me to try and scrunch my nose. Only one side of my nose scrunched. My right side did not move. I started to cry. Could this really be happening. She told me to take some pain killers and take a nap and see how it was when I woke up. So I did and after getting the crying under control I slept. I woke up to more of the right side of my face not working. By Monday morning I pretty much lost most of the muscle control to that side. I pretty much knew at that point that I had Bells Palsy. I tried to smile, only one side. Honestly I was really scared. My Mom had it when I was a little girl. It gave me hope that hers went away, but I am still a little scared.

My great friend Dawny came that morning and watched my kiddos so that Blake could go with me to the doctor and confirmed that yes, I have Bells Palsy. The right side of my face is essentially paralyzed temporarily. He put me on a steroid and anti-viral medications. I have to put eye drops in my eye to keep it moist since it doesn't close all the way on it's on. To be perfectly honest, my eye bothers me the most. So here we are. My wonderful husband continues to keep the house running while I try to figure out how to function.

I thought about telling people that I tried botox and by the time they got done with the first side of my face, it hurt to much and so I decided not to do the other side! We are trying to keep the humor going in our house. Blake thinks it would make a great addition to a Halloween costume...he said I could go as two face and he'd go as Batman. I told him he better be prepared for Batman to lose this time! I'm not sure if I'm ready to go out into public yet...the fear of people staring is keeping me from taking that step. I thought about posting a picture, but I'm not ready for that either. Maybe some day, just not today. So for now, my smile may be broken, but I'm not giving up hope. I'll get it back.

Thank you for all those who have kept us in your prayers. Thank you to all the angels who we call our family and friends. I am truly blessed. I suppose if this has to happen to someone I will take it. I wouldn't want this to happen to someone who is not as blessed as I to have the support system that I have. Thank you to all of my angels. I love you and will always be indebted to you.